Meet me at the altar: Weddings at the Old Mission Santa Barbara

A few years ago an extended family member was planning her wedding in Santa Barbara. She had wanted to have the ceremony at the Mission, but something had kept her from that and she decided on a different church. I don't know all of the details but it was either residency, price, or rules that deterred her. Flash forward to two years later and I was just married at the Mission. The process is involved, requires dedication and attention to detail, and may not be what every bride pictures.

The Mission is run by Franciscans and is a Catholic parish also known as St. Barbara Parish. They have daily morning mass, weekend masses, and services for sacraments (baptisms, weddings, funerals). Weddings are among their most popular services and require quite a bit from the bride and groom.

To begin, a wedding information session is held every other month. Prospective couples meet the Pastor, find out about the rules and requirements, book a date, and pay their deposit. About 10 couples are at every meeting. If you want to reserve a date, this is when you do it. Dates are generally booked around a year in advance, based on church and priest availability. Weddings usually do not take place between Thanksgiving and Christmas, and the season of Lent. The ceremony begins at 1pm, runs about an hour, and everyone must be out by 2:30pm. They require flower arrangements to be left in the church, for the upcoming week's masses. But flower petals cannot be placed anywhere (even the flower girl cannot toss them as she walks down the aisle). Because the Mission is a tourist attraction, bubbles and confetti are not to be used outside (because someone might slip or because of the mess it leaves).

Other requirements are that one person in the couple must be a baptized Catholic, two witnesses on each side must sign a freedom to marry form, the couple must attend an "Engaged Encounter" weekend, and a license must be obtained from the city.

There is a meeting with Father Daniel (who does all the weddings) to discuss relationship, why we want to have a Catholic wedding at the Mission, what marriage means to us. During that meeting he takes notes to help him prepare his homily for the ceremony. We also give him baptism, first communion, and confirmation certificates. If one is not Catholic they must sign a form of consent stating that they will support the other in their Catholic faith. A follow-up meeting is done once the Engaged Encounter weekend is complete. Here we discuss readings with Father Daniel.

The next meeting is with the church coordinator. She collects our wedding worksheet, witness forms, and discusses all rehearsal and ceremony details. Witnesses (usually parents) must fill out a form at their home parishes, and submit it. Then there's a meeting with Music Director to discuss all music and ceremony program. The Music Director puts together the program, unless you want to diy it.

This is basically on overview of the rules/requirements, but I'm sure I'm missing a few things. It's a lot of work, but everyone at the Mission is helpful, organized, and knowledgeable about what you need to do. And even with the restrictions and requirements, to us, a ceremony there is worth it because of the place, the history, the location, the love.

Has either of your venues (ceremony, reception) had strict requirements?



Blog title is from lyrics by Jagged Edge